What My Father Taught Me About Love

A father is the first man a woman will ever love in her life. The way he treats her, her mother and any women in his life is what she’ll remember throughout her own lifetime. My own father made me into the woman I am today, and I’m grateful for everything he has taught me about love.

1. He taught me to be patient. Love doesn’t come without compromise or without a fight. Relationships will always have battles to face, whether it’s with each other or with the rest of the world. The secret to holding it all together is to be patient and understanding and to ride out the storms as they come with the best possible gusto we can muster. Life isn’t perfect, and love isn’t any different.
2. He taught me not to take things for granted. He never takes my mother for granted, even if she’s not always behaving perfectly. He appreciates who she is in his heart and his life. He doesn’t distract the temporary disagreements for permanent dissolution. Because loyal partners willing to fight for the relationships are hard to come by in a world where divorce is too easy.
3. He taught me self-respect. I learned to respect myself and to hold myself in high regard before I give my heart away, which might be while I hold it to myself so closely. I’m not easily fooled by the showmanship; I’m more interested in the details — how he treats me, how he respects me, and how he can make me feel like I’m special.
4. He taught me forgiveness. If conflict arises and you’ve gone overboard in the fight, he’s taught me the value of forgiveness. When it comes to loving someone for the rest of your life, you can’t hold your ego in higher regard than the one you’ve chosen to spend your life with. Forgiveness is a key ingredient in the recipe for everlasting love.
5. He taught me to be honest. I know to never hold back, and to always be truthful to the one I care about most. Lies will haunt any relationship, and there’s no point in being with anyone if you need to lie in order to keep them around. Even if it’s scary, I need to reveal all the parts of myself and that I should be proud of the woman I am, because sooner or later, the right one will appreciate and love me for it.
6. He taught me to have standards. He’s shown me I should never lower my worth by lowering what I deserve and want in a loving relationship. My mother still challenges him to this day and he’s taught me that in relationships, we should never stop striving to be the best versions of ourselves we can be. When we bring our best selves to the table, the relationship will continue to thrive in an unbreakable way.
7. He showed me that true love exists. It didn’t matter what people thought about his marriage to my mother. Even with naysayers and people who doubted them, the love they shared was much stronger than anything. They weren’t tainted by the warnings, nor did they care about the fallouts; their love was the most important thing and he’s taught me that fairy tales can happen in a variety of ways.
8. He taught me never to settle. My father has shown me what relationships can be, and I can never settle for anything less. I’m not looking for perfection; I want someone who is willing to work on growing, harnessing, and mending loves true worth, through the good, the bad and the ugly, ’til death do us part.
9. He taught me never to give up. Because contrary to what people might believe, I’ve witnessed it through the decades and I know that this kind of love exists, and it’ll be worth the wait.