Why The Penguin Boyfriend Is Even Better Than The Unicorn

Everyone raves about finding a unicorn, but the penguin is actually better. Here’s what you need to know about this type of boyfriend and why he rules.

  1. He’s the forever boyfriend. Penguins tend to mate for life, and the only time they’ll search for a new mate is when their current mate dies. Wow. Rest assured, the penguin boyfriend is in this relationship for the long haul. He sees himself growing old with you.
  2. The unicorn might not actually be around forever. Yes, the unicorn wants a LTR and doesn’t mess you around, but who’s to say he’s actually going to be around forever? The penguin, on the other hand, makes it clear that he is.
  3. He’s family oriented. The unicorn might be cool with meeting your folks, but the penguin goes one step further. He loves spending time with your, and his, loved ones. He lets you into every part of his life so that you feel you’re onto something great from the start with him. He sees you as his family, really.
  4. He’s romantic, but he doesn’t love-bomb you. It’s easy to fall for Mr. Perfect’s love-bombing rituals, like how he gives you lots of gifts to make you like him. You might think the love-bombing guy is a unicorn, only to get your heart broken and realize he was pretending to be the unicorn. You can’t mistake a penguin for a toxic guy because you can see straight away that he’s the real deal. In the wild, penguins give their object of affection rocks, but the nicest, smoothest ones they can find. See? Not OTT, but meaningful.
  5. You can be yourself around him. Admit it: sometimes the unicorn can be a little intimidating. You know you’re a catch and all, but he’s all about the flair and romance. The penguin, on the other hand, lets you feel comfortable. You can just kick your shoes off and be yourself.
  6. He’s big on communication. Penguins actually talk to each other a lot because they know how important communication is to keep their relationships strong. So the penguin BF is going to be sure that you stay connected. He wants to share everything with you.
  7. He supports you. Penguins support each other by living in towns called rookeries. Here it’s easier for them to protect each other from cold and predators. The penguin boyfriend always supports and defends you. Even though you’re independent, it’s still nice to be taken care of and be treated with chivalry.
  8. He’s not mythical. The thing about the unicorn guy is that he’s a mythical creature and it’s really hard to find one. You and your girlfriends moan about this all the time, right? But the penguin isn’t extinct or mythical – he might be standing in front of you right now! Look around. Go on. Do it. While unicorn boyfriends feel like they might as well be in movies because they’re so perfect, penguins are real AF.
  9. He delivers. You might say you don’t want the unicorn boyfriend who seems so amazing and gets everyone oohing and aahing. No really, you just want a regular decent guy. Enter the penguin boyfriend! He’s got his head screwed on straight, he’s honest, and extremely loyal. What more do you need from a boyfriend?
  10. He’s humble. The unicorn is used to being showered with loads of attention, which has made him step up his dating game. The penguin, on the other hand, is pretty down-to-earth and humble. He doesn’t have to ride in on clouds to impress you. He’s just genuinely good without all the fuss. That’s what makes him so refreshing.
  11. He’s cuddly. The unicorn is beautiful and eye-catching, but the penguin is huggable AF! Let’s be real: sometimes you just want cute and cuddly over ridiculously attractive. You can spend all weekend nesting with the penguin, which is sometimes just what the doctor ordered.
  12. You don’t have to make him up. You might have a list of Perfect Guy qualities you look for in a potential partner, so you end up creating the unicorn boyfriend in your head. This can lead to unrealistic expectations. Although having high dating standards is good, you risk RL not living up to your imagination. But with the penguin, you don’t have to dream him up. He’s the solid, dependable, and easy to relate to guy in your life. He might not seem that exciting, but he’s what you really want in a life partner.
  13. He’s boyfriend material, but it hasn’t gone to his head. The problem with unicorn guys is that if they know they’re seen as unicorns, this might go to their head and inflate their damn egos. SMH. The next thing you know, they’re saying what nice, feminist guys they are as though they’re expecting applause or people to throw roses at them wherever they go. Ugh. With the penguin guy, he knows he’s the penguin but he reckons it’s nothing to write home about. This is sort of like when a guy’s really sexy but doesn’t see it. It makes him even more appealing! The penguin doesn’t need to brag about what he’s about. What you see is what you get. That’s what makes him such a catch. Plus, he looks really good in a tux. Just saying…
Giulia Simolo is a writer from Johannesburg, South Africa with a degree in English Language and Literature. She has been working as a journalist for more than a decade, writing for sites including AskMen, Native Interiors, and Live Eco. You can find out more about her on Facebook and LinkedIn, or follow her on Twitter @GiuliaSimolo.
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