Opinion: Moving Too Fast Is A Great Way To Ruin A Relationship

Some people have no problem letting themselves fall head-over-heels for someone almost immediately. That’s great for them, but it’s not really my thing. This is why I’d much rather take things slow instead of rushing head-first into love:

  1. Love Is Scary. Falling in love is absolutely terrifying! It’s pretty intimidating to know that another person has to be as invested as you are in order for the relationship to work. All it takes is one big mistake to ruin the whole relationship. I’d much rather take things slowly so I know what I’m getting into instead of getting hurt by rushing in too fast.
  2. I’m determined to stay true to who I am. I refuse to pick a guy that I want to spend time with who doesn’t match up with my values, and finding out that information can take a long time. My guard will most definitely be up until I’ve established that the same things are important to both of us.
  3. I need to protect my heart. I find loving people to be extremely easy, but falling in love is a different story. My heart is under lock, key, barbed wire, and surrounded by hungry crocodiles. And yet, I have faith that someone out there will eventually manage to get through it all. It’s going to take time for all those obstacles to be cleared away, but I’m content with knowing that it’s going to take someone truly special to be able to do it.
  4. I prefer quality over quantity. I don’t have much interest in falling in love multiple times. All it means is more heartache for me when things inevitably fall apart time after time. I’ll just be picky and take my time. The guy who’s right for me will be well worth the wait.
  5. I know it’ll be worth it. When you’re in love, it’s the absolute best feeling in the world. I’m just excited for the day that I find myself knee-deep in a gooey puddle of love. Once that moment comes around, I know I’ll be glad I waited all this time.
  6. Love is a Gift. Everyone has people in their life that they’d do anything for. For me, those people are truly blessings, and I want the person I fall in love with to fit into the same category. But I know that getting to that point takes a lot of work, and I’m not going to take any shortcuts and risk throwing it all away.
  7. I’m scared of losing interest. That honeymoon phase doesn’t last forever, and I know a few too many people that coughed out the “L” word much too soon. I would rather wait for that slump that follows to see if we’re still having fun when doing absolutely nothing. If those butterflies stick around after a few arguments, I’ll know it’s the real deal.
  8. I know how to distinguish between love and lust. Lust and love feel almost the same when you’re in the moment, but now, I know how to tell the difference. The passionate sensation of lust is great and all, but I know I’ll have to wait a bit more to move past that stage and find true love.
  9. I want to be in love with my best friend. They always say you should marry your best friend, and even if you don’t make it down the aisle, I know that dating is so much more fun once that special someone is more than just a romantic partner. If I take the time to really get to know a guy, I have no doubt that we’ll end up becoming so much more than boyfriend and girlfriend.
  10. Slow And Steady wins the race. That old childhood story was exactly right. I’d never tolerate a guy trying to pressure me into falling for him faster than my comfort level permitted. Everyone falls in love at a different pace. Mine just happens to be that of a tortoise, and I’m just fine with that.
Tori is a recent college graduate trying to find her place in this world. She loves to travel (way too much), play volleyball, and practice her broken German when she isn't working as a safari specialist.
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