If Women Wearing Makeup Is “False Advertisement,” So Are These 10 Things Men Do

If Women Wearing Makeup Is “False Advertisement,” So Are These 10 Things Men Do ©iStock/PeopleImages

We’re all sick and tired of hearing men complain about women wearing makeup. Sure, we might look a little different when we wipe it all off for the night, but our personality doesn’t change with our mascara. If men really liked us for who we are instead of for superficial reasons, then the “false advertisement” complaint would be moot. Of course, since men are never going to stop complaining about it, here are a few things they do that we could call “false advertisement” if we wanted to:

  1. Growing out his facial hair. If he has a clean shaven face on his Tinder, but then you meet him and he’s covered in fur for Movember, then that was false advertising. After all, he wasn’t born with facial hair, just like you weren’t born with makeup, so why should he be allowed to alter his appearance with it?
  2. Asking you to “Netflix and chill.” You visited him with the intention of watching the last season of Supernatural. If you’re only ten minutes into an episode when he starts kissing you, it proves he was full of crap. He never intended on watching anything, so why did he have to lie to you about it?
  3. Changing after you sleep with him. Acting like a complete gentleman on the first date to get in our pants, and then treating us like trash after we sleep with him is false advertisement. Changing his personality as soon as he gets what he wants is unacceptable.
  4. Wearing cologne. Cologne isn’t natural; body odor is. So if he wears a sexy scent in order to smell good for a date, it’s really false advertisement. When you wake up next to him and he doesn’t have that cologne on anymore, you’ll wonder if you fell asleep with the same person.
  5. Pretending to listen. If he nods his head, pretending to listen to us speak, we’ll assume that he’s attentive. Of course, it’s all a lie if he was just daydreaming about another woman while we were yammering on about our day.
  6. Posting deceiving pictures. If his profile picture shows him lifting weights at the gym, but he only worked out that one time, it’s BS AND false advertisement. He shouldn’t be pretending he’s a gym rat just to attract woman.
  7. Wearing hats. If he wears a hat to cover up his bald spot, it’s false advertisement. It’s his way of covering up the thing he’s self-conscious about, which is the reason why most women wear makeup. So if we have to say goodbye to eyeliner, men should say goodbye to baseball caps.
  8. Stuffing his jeans. Some men will stuff a sock in their jeans to make their package look bigger. That’s ridiculous and a lie, so his socks should stay on his feet. Otherwise, we could end up in emotional distress over such a disappointing trick.
  9. Flexing his muscles. If a man wants to make his biceps look huge, here are certain ways for him to stand in photographs. Of course, that would be false advertisement. If we aren’t seeing the muscles in a relaxed state, then it’s all a lie.
  10. Calling himself a man. It takes more than old age to be considered mature. If he claims that he’s a man, but then he complains about women tricking him with makeup, he has the mind of a little boy. It’s false advertisement at its finest.
Holly Riordan is a writer from Long Island, New York who has authored several science fiction and horror books. A graduate of Stony Brook University, she has spent nearly a decade writing for publications including Thought Catalog, Huffington Post, Teen Vogue, and more. You can find her on Instagram @hollyrio and Twitter @hollyyrio.
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