He Literally Handed Me A List of Girlfriend Requirements On Our First Date

We all have date requirements and checklists when trying to find the perfect partner, but one guy I met online took things a little too far. I guess when he told me he was the real-life Sheldon Cooper from The Big Bang Theory, I should have taken him seriously.

  1. We hit it off… at first. We met at a restaurant and started chatting and laughing the second we greeted each other. It seemed like we had instant chemistry. Sadly, it wasn’t meant to last longer than a few minutes. We ordered something to drink before ordering our food and once our drinks arrived, he changed the topic of conversation from light banter to serious stuff.
  2. He told me about his girlfriend requirements. This guy didn’t have a list of what he wanted in a partner, he had a freaking thesis on what he expected from the person he dated. He actually handed me an A4 sheet of paper that had a list of his girlfriend requirements on it. Yes, seriously. I laughed in his face. This guy couldn’t be serious, right? Unfortunately, he was.
  3. I tried to give him the benefit of the doubt. As I started reading this list, I at least hoped it was going to be romantic or cute. I mean, the least this guy could have done was show me a list with desirable qualities like humility and honesty or his need for someone with great loyalty and who loved being showered with all the attention he’d give her. Unsurprisingly, nothing like that was on the cards.
  4. He claimed he had high standards. This was the reason he gave for why he wanted such crazy things like a woman who lets him lead in the relationship (sexist, much?) and a woman who texts daily but doesn’t become clingy (what?) and a woman who hits the gym at least five times a week. Ugh. I just read the list and felt my blood pressure rise. This wasn’t about high standards. These were ridiculous, arrogant, and insulting requirements that no one should be expected to meet. How arrogant can you get?
  5. Who did he think he was? He showed up to the date thinking he could put all his requirements out there and I’d just jump to meet them all. I had to fit the bill and prove my worth to someone who clearly didn’t deserve a woman of quality. I don’t think so, buddy.
  6. I told him he was with the wrong person. I wasn’t going to waste another second of my time on this loser. I told him I didn’t fit in with what he wanted and I didn’t want to waste his time. He accepted it and thanked me for my honesty then said he hoped I wasn’t offended. Oh really?
  7. I told him exactly what I thought of him. This was one of those moments in life when I wasn’t about to remain quiet about my true feelings. If anyone deserved to be called a jerk, it was this guy. He said he was just trying to find the right person and was sick of wasting time on the wrong one. I told him that his list was insulting and ridiculous and that no one should ever have to fit such pathetic requirements.
  8. It made me rethink my standards. Although this guy’s list of girlfriend requirements was pathetic, it did make me question my own standards. He really didn’t see that those requirements were toxic, and maybe it’s easy to throw a lot of partner requirements into the dating standards category without really questioning them. I always said I wanted a guy who was chivalrous and taller than me, so if those were written down in a list of dream-guy traits, would those be seen as too much or insulting by potential partners?
  9. I had to change my list. Meeting this guy made me see that some things like height and chivalry are unnecessary. Same goes for the guy’s body type and overall appearance. I wanted to focus on real qualities that would make someone great to date without being superficial. I wanted something real and long-lasting. Maybe on some level, we all have crazy partner requirements and this guy was just very open and blunt about them and I wasn’t feeling it. I doubt he’ll find a woman who is, but who knows?
Giulia Simolo is a writer from Johannesburg, South Africa with a degree in English Language and Literature. She has been working as a journalist for more than a decade, writing for sites including AskMen, Native Interiors, and Live Eco. You can find out more about her on Facebook and LinkedIn, or follow her on Twitter @GiuliaSimolo.
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