I Knew We Wouldn’t Last, But I’d Still Do It All Over Again

When we met, our instant connection ignited a fire inside me that I didn’t know could burn so bright. Logic tried to pull me away but the push towards you was too strong to ignore. I knew we wouldn’t work out and I knew I should have walked away long before we actually said goodbye, but in hindsight, I’d do the same things all over again in a heartbeat.

1. The passion was worth the pain. Leaving what we had wasn’t easy because when we were together, something inside us was different. I’ve never felt such an intense level of passion and connection with anyone, and for me, it was worth exploring more. Even though things ended abruptly and in chaos, looking back, I wouldn’t change a thing. Feeling what I felt with you at the time was worth all the pain I experienced when leaving you behind.
2. You made me feel alive. You made me feel awake in ways I’d never imagined I could be. I was the happiest version of myself I could be when you were around, and that’s what makes the fact we didn’t work out a hard pill to swallow. How can two people who shared such a deep soul connection be completely wrong for each other in life? If soulmates are real, you were definitely mine — but it takes more than soul mates to bond two complete lives together for the long haul.
3. You solidified my dealbreakers. When we started to come up against our dealbreakers, I avoided them like a plague because I knew what it meant. In hindsight, I think we both knew deep down the ending was inevitable, but we kept things going in a state of denial. No matter how long we tried to avoid the truth, it caught up to us in the end. I know better now than to tie my heart up into something that will never fully unravel itself.
4. You prepared me for my future. I should regret my time with you but the truth is, I don’t — not even a little bit. Every single fight, make up, memory and laugh was something that I needed to go through in order to become a better version of myself for my future. I learned about myself with you, and what I need to have in a person in order to build a life with them. You may not have been The One, but I don’t regret any of my days with you.
5. I needed to break to rebuild. Breaking away from you was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do but I know in my heart, I needed to fully sink and drown myself in order to become someone new. I fell hard and fast for you and in breaking down completely, I found the strength to rebuild myself into someone brand new — someone who knows better for having loved you before.
6. Our memories still make me smile. I can never look back on our time together and feel anger or regret. Even reliving the fights in my mind put a smile on my face. I needed to have those fights, those highs and those lows to appreciate relationships in a new way. You taught me that not everything in life is going to be perfect — and not everything is built to last.
7. We had to try in order to avoid regret. When we met, we had no choice but to try because the connection was just too real to pass by. I would rather have loved you and failed than regret never loving you at all.
8. Some of the best things have an expiration date. Just as milk has a shelf life, so do some relationships — ours was one of them. You played your part in my story and I’m glad you left the footprint you did on my heart.
9. We tried our best. In the end, we tried to make what we had together work to our advantage, but life has a funny way of working itself out as it’s supposed to. It was hard at the time to turn around and walk away from what we had together but when I look back on us, I would do everything all over again in exactly the same way — even though it means we were never meant to last.