I’m A Single AF Girl Looking For A Single AF Kind Of Guy

My status as a single lady isn’t new. It’s been a long time since my last serious relationship and I’m not afraid to admit that I’m single AF. I don’t think that’s a bad thing though. In fact, I think it’s a strength and I’m looking for an equally strong single AF guy. Here’s why:

  1. I don’t want to be a rebound. If you’re a guy who jumps from one girl to the next, then you can just keep on moving. I have no interest in being the girl who helps you heal your heart before you leave me in the dust for someone you want a real relationship with. Getting over your ex is a job for you and you alone. There’s strength in picking yourself back up and I won’t do that for you or any other guy.
  2. I want real love. Single AF men know how to really love a woman. They know how to treat a woman right. They’ve been alone long enough that when they find a good woman, they know they’re lucky. I want to find a guy who truly believes that being with me is a gift. Single AF people know that finding true love isn’t a guarantee, and that’s why it’s priceless.
  3. I want a relationship, not just sex. Single AF men want more than just a warm body. They want a woman they can truly love. Why? Because they’re not playboys. Single AF guys are single by choice. They could be out getting girl after girl, but they’re not interested in that. Single AF guys aren’t into hookup culture, they’re into relationships, and that’s exactly what I want.
  4. If you’re desperate, move along. If you desperately want to change your single status to “in a relationship” it won’t be with me, that’s for sure. I want to be with a man who wants to be with me but doesn’t NEED to be with me. Single AF guys aren’t afraid of the single life. They’ll be with a woman by choice, not by necessity.
  5. I want a man who’s independent. Why? Because I’m an independent woman. I’m single AF, which means I’ve already built a life of my own. A life I happen to like, so I’m not going to give up my whole life just to be with some dependent guy. I’m still going to be me. I’m still going to have my priorities, and if you can’t understand then you’re not the single AF guy for me.
  6. I’m not going to waste my time trying to make someone happy. That’s your job. Single AF people are content on their own. They’re not afraid of the single life. In fact, they’ve been single so long that they’ve actually embraced it because they know it’s not so bad. They’re happy on their own and don’t need anyone to complete them.
  7. I don’t want to be just another girl on your roster. Single AF guys aren’t players. They don’t have long lists of exes, hookup buddies, and friends with benefits. That means I’ll be more than just a number. They don’t just want another warm body. If they’re with me, it’s because they want me and only me.
  8. I won’t try to fix a man. Works in progress guys aren’t my forte. Single AF guys have spent so much time alone that they already know exactly who they are. They aren’t still discovering themselves and they’ve already healed from their past breakups. I don’t need to fix them because they’ve already fixed themselves, and that’s exactly how it should be.
  9. I need to know a guy wants me, not just anyone. Single people go through phases of simply wanting relationships instead of wanting a specific person. I refuse to simply be the cure for a guy’s single and lonely lifestyle. I deserve to be the girl of his dreams, not just the girl that saves him from your nightmare. Single AF dudes have already come to terms with life on their own and just like single AF women, they’re only going to go for people they really like.
  10. I refuse to settle. Single AF guys have accepted that while they want love, they might never find it. It sounds sad, but to me that’s a load of pressure lifted off my shoulders. A single AF man isn’t waiting for me to make everything better. He’ll be with me for no other reason than he likes the real me. That’s what I want. That’s real love, and I won’t settle for anything less than a guy formerly known as single AF.
Kelsey Dykstra is a freelance writer based in Huntington Beach, CA. She has a bachelor’s degree in Creative Writing from Grand Valley State University and been writing professionally since graduating in 2013. In addition to writing about love and relationships for Bolde and lifestyle topics for Love to Know, she also writes about payment security and small business solutions for PaymentCloud.

Originally from Michigan, this warm weather seeker relocated to the OC just last summer. Kelsey enjoys writing her own fictional pieces, reading a variety of young adult novels, binging on Netflix, and of course soaking up the sun.

You can find more about Kelsey on her LinkedIn profile or on Twitter @dykstrakelsey.
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