The fact that men view texting differently than women is no surprise, but how do you know when one of us is into you? It would be nice if we were great at expressing our feelings clearly and directly, but most of us just aren’t. Sorry about that! You’ll need to pay close attention and try to decode our behavior, at least in the early stages of our relationship, if you want to know where we stand. To help you out a bit, here’s how a guy texts when he likes you.
- We text back right away. If we like you, we don’t want to keep you waiting. Most of the time, guys aren’t overly concerned about sitting by our phone so we can text back right away, but when we like you, we’re eager to hear from you and excited to text back. If you hear back from us within a couple of minutes, we’re definitely into you.
- We text you first. If a guy is really into you, he may not even wait for you to text him. To be fair, you shouldn’t always expect a guy to text you first, but if he jumpstarts the text convo, it’s a good sign that he likes you. He may even send multiple unanswered texts. This can indicate that he’s really eager to hear back from you and getting a little nervous that you’re not responding.
- Our texts get longer. In general, most guys aren’t all that interested in sending long texts. We keep things short and to the point. However, when a guy deviates from this pattern, it’s usually a sign that we’re feeling you. We’re not purposely sending you long texts to show that we like you. Rather, deep down we like you and that makes us want to share a lot with you, and that makes us a little long-winded.
- We actually use emojis. According to Texting 101, most guys hate emojis. Sure, there may be a few exceptions, but for the most part, we’re not down with using them and don’t particularly enjoy getting them unless it’s a smiley face. However, all of that goes out the window when we genuinely like someone. Any guy who takes the time to pick out a flirty emoji to text you is definitely interested.
- We ask weird questions. From our perspective, these aren’t weird questions. The thing is, everybody knows the standard “getting to know you via text” questions so when a guy likes you, he’ll break with convention and his usual pattern. This means he’ll get creative with what he’ll ask you. Yes, this may come off as a little weird, but he’s just trying to get to know you better than some other random girl he was texting with last week.
- We try to make plans. As mentioned, most guys don’t love texting all that much. Thus, we try to move past texting as soon as possible. If a guy tries to make plans or strongly hints at wanting to hang out, it probably means he likes you. A guy that’s cool just chatting via text without making plans is either putting you in the friend zone or leading you on.
- We’ll text you when we get up and before bed. In most cases, a guy texting “good morning” at the start of the day and “good night” at the end of the day is a clear sign that he likes you. It’s worth noting that some guys will do this with several girls at the same time. If he seems like a player, be careful not to read into this too much, especially if he says “good morning, cutie” instead of using your name. If she seems genuine and does this regularly, however, he’s probably really into you.
- We’ll text all day. Most of the time, guys absolutely hate all-day text marathons. They’re time-consuming and a little bit pointless. Still, we know that the ladies tend to like it so we’ll play along if we like someone. This is one thing disingenuous guys usually won’t do to trick a girl into liking them. If you have a guy who’s willing to text back and forth all day, he definitely has feelings for you.
- We text you while drunk. The caveat here is that a drunk guy isn’t just texting you to make a booty call. As long as that’s not the case, a drunk text can actually be a positive thing. Drinking can make some people a little more honest than they usually are. If nothing else, their guard is down a little. When a guy is drunk and feels compelled to start texting you, it could be a sign that he’s interested in being more than friends.
- We text you jokes. As mentioned, guys tend to text with a purpose. A lot of times, texting is just a means to an end, but if we take time to text you jokes or a funny story, it can be a sign we like you. Again, doing this would break texting convention for guys, and we usually only do that for women we like. Texting you jokes and trying to make you laugh is our way of trying to brighten your day a little. We wouldn’t be doing that if we didn’t like you.
There you have it — tips on how to tell a guy likes you via the way he texts. Of course, he should also be making concrete moves to secure your relationship and actually show you how he feels about you too, but some of us can be a bit slow on the uptake.
How to show a guy you like him via text
You can’t leave him alone to do all the flirting and put in all the effort. Throw him a bone and let him know you’re into him too by doing these things.
- Ask him questions about himself and his interests. The easiest way to show someone you like them is by engaging with them about themselves. Show curiosity about who he is, what’s going on in his life, and the things he likes and dislikes. Not only will you get to know him on a deeper level but he’ll get the message that you’re actually into him and what he has to say.
- Respond thoughtfully in a reasonable amount of time. While you shouldn’t sit by your phone 24/7 just waiting for him to message so you can type a response up within 30 seconds, you should show him that he’s important to you by responding to him in a reasonable amount of time. If you’re busy, that’s cool — let him know you can’t really chat but you’ll get back to him later. Also, avoid one-word answers that make it seem like you’re either pissed off at him or don’t really care about talking to him. Whenever possible, give him a genuine, well-thought-out response that shows that he’s a priority to you.
- Use your words, not your emoji keyboard. There’s nothing wrong with using a few emojis here and there, but how are you supposed to get to know each other and enjoy flirting if you’re constantly sending a line of them in every conversation rather than using your words? You can’t have a conversation otherwise, and he may start to lose interest or think you have nothing to say for yourself if all you can do is send a line of crying laughing emojis to everything he says.
- Send him cute selfies. There’s a thin line here between sending a selfie to a guy as a form of subtle flirtation/a way to up the sexual tension and looking like a total narcissist trying to set thirst traps. In other words, you should proceed with caution here. You know from the way he texts you that he likes you, so you don’t need to go overboard here. When you’re feeling cute, just take a snap and send him a little message. He won’t be able to get you off his mind and he’ll feel pretty special to be the recipient of your photo (especially if it’s not one you then go and post on your Instagram feed).
- Let him know you’re thinking of him. If you’re far enough along in your conversations that you feel comfortable telling him you’re thinking of him, do it! If he’s into you, he’ll love getting the assurance that you’re on the same page and that he’s not alone/won’t face rejection from you. You can do this by directly saying it — something like, “Hey! Was just thinking of you — how did your work meeting go?” — is super casual. You can also do it indirectly by mentioning something that happened/something you saw that brought him to mind. Either way, he’ll love knowing he’s in your head like you are in his.
