You might think hot sex is what’s going to keep your relationship alive and thriving, but intimacy goes well beyond the physical. If you and your partner aren’t on track outside the bedroom, you can’t expect what happens in it to fix what’s wrong.
- Sex is influenced by what’s going on outside of the bedroom. Great sex in a relationship doesn’t just happen. It’s influenced by your relationship dynamics and how well you connect outside of the bedroom. If there’s no connection, communication, love and respect out there, great sex isn’t going to fix what you’re lacking.
- Great sex doesn’t mean a great relationship. You can have sex that’s off the charts without being in a great or even healthy relationship. Why do you think hookup culture is so prevalent and so many people are into the idea of friends with benefits? Don’t be fooled into thinking that your relationship is on the mend because the sex is so fired up. It’s an important part of a strong romantic partnership, but it’s far from everything.
- Sex can’t make someone change. If you have relationship issues that need to be dealt with, sex isn’t going to be able to improve them — and it certainly won’t make your partner more likely to deal with those issues. If you think that, you’re bending over backward for nothing more than physical gratification.
- Sex can bring the spark back but not create it from nothing. If you’re going through a really bad time in your relationship, you might think some great sex is what will bring you and your partner closer. And it might — for the night, that is. But if there’s no love, sex will be useless AF when it comes to getting you and your partner back on your feet in the relationship.
- It gives him the wrong message. If you’re keen on trying to get your relationship back by using some sexy strategies, it could be giving your partner the message that you’re just keen on bonding physically. Maybe deep down you are, or maybe you just feel insecure and don’t want to lose your relationship. Whatever you’re feeling, there are healthier ways of dealing.
- It can backfire. Make sex in your relationship a priority and he might just decide that the relationship can be tanked. Why not just downgrade to a friends-with-benefits setup or regular booty calls since sex is the most important thing and the only thing you both want?
- Sex can become a distraction. Relying on sex can be a big distraction in your relationship. You might think that it promotes closeness, love and all that good stuff. Or, after a heated session between the sheets, you might think that you’re closer to your partner than ever. But ask yourself: once the rush of sex fades, is there a connection with your partner? Anything?
- Sex is only one way to be intimate. Sure, your relationship needs physical intimacy in order to be healthy, but you also need other forms of intimacy for an all-round great relationship, such as emotional intimacy, which is even more important than what’s happening in bed.
- Sooner or later, the sex will get old. There are only so many new and interesting things you can do in the sack before things get boring or the problems you have outside of your relationship crash your sexy bedroom time. So sure, the endorphins released in the bedroom might make your relationship feel good again, but that comes with an expiry date.
- Sex won’t solve your boredom. If you’re keen on having a better sex life because you’re bored in your relationship, don’t bother. It’s not going to help you much if you’re just not feeling the relationship anymore. You might be hoping that sex will make you feel like you’re having fun together, but if you’re constantly bored in the relationship, then why the hell are you there? Clearly the guy’s not right for you.
- Perhaps it’s time to GTFO. Sex has become really easy to get these days, but using sex to make your relationship work is not the easy option you were hoping for it to be. You deserve a relationship that offers you the best of everything, sex included. If you can’t get the whole deal with this guy, then maybe it’s a sign that you’re in the wrong relationship.
