That Guy Who Loves To Sext But That’s About It? He’s A Total Waste

That Guy Who Loves To Sext But That’s About It? He’s A Total Waste ©iStock/pixelfit

There’s nothing wrong with a bit of sexting when you’re dating a guy and the chemistry is off the charts. It can add an extra element of attraction that makes your real life sexcapades that better. However, if he has no problem rambling off long things he’d like to do to you between the sheets but can’t bother picking up the phone to call or text you about activities outside the bedroom, he’s definitely not worth your time.

  1. He isn’t making any real effort. Anyone can sext, but come on — you want to hear his voice and have a real conversation, not just look at pictures of his junk. Gross. People sext even if they’re not that into each other, so it doesn’t reassure you of his intentions at all. It’s lazy and presumptuous. Put a stop to it.
  2. He just wants to get his rocks off. He’s horny, so he sexts you late at night. He’s just hoping to end his day with a bit of fun and it’s convenient for him if you’re still awake. If not, he’ll probably just sext someone else. Double gross.
  3. He wants to get to know you better? Don’t buy it. If you ask the sexter why he sexts and never calls, he might say he’s hoping to get to know you better. But no, he just wants to see more of your body. He has no interest in your mind or personality — if he did, he’d be calling, and he’d most definitely be interested in you outside of sex.
  4. He’s probably done this a million times before. Don’t feel special when he says that he’s never sexted before but he really likes you so he wants to give it a go. When guys say this, they’re usually lying, especially if they’re suggesting sexting soon after meeting you.
  5. He’d rather have naughty fun than get real. If he’s not interested in who you are then chances are he’s not opening up to you emotionally either. So then why sext? It really doesn’t feel good to know that it’s just about his self-pleasure. Sure, if you want to keep things casual, that’s fine, but if you’re looking for an actual relationship, it’s a no-go.
  6. He’s obviously not that into you. A guy who’s really into a woman will be tame about sexual stuff in the beginning. He’ll tread carefully when it comes to sexting, so as not to put her off, make her think he’s just looking for sex or come across as shady. If he’s got no problem keeping things strictly sexual, he’s probably fine keeping it in that realm.
  7. It doesn’t mean he wants real life fun. You might think that the sexter will want to eventually take your sex into real life, but it doesn’t always mean that. He can be confident and sexy behind a screen and a total wimp in real life. He could be Photoshopping his penis, FFS. He just wants to have fun with you but you’re not even really there!
  8. Calling is stressful — that’s why it’s a must. It’s way too easy to sext and text because people are hiding behind their screens. Picking up the phone and actually speaking to a woman can feel scary. If a guy can do that, he’s really making an effort.
  9. You want someone who’ll go the extra mile. Calling is a way of saying that a guy will reach out and make the proper effort. He’s interested in learning more about you. He wants to have a real conversation. He’s romantic and wants to chat for three hours on end. This separates him from the players by a mile.
  10. He doesn’t want to take things to the next level. If a guy’s always sexting you, an emotional connection is rarely the next step. Dating him has been in reverse and the mystery has been killed.
  11. Sexting makes you feel cheap. Sexting can bond you and your partner if you already know each other and have a real connection that’s greater than lust. But if he’s only sexting you, and so quickly after meeting you, it makes you feel dirty — and not in a good way.
  12. It ruins the guy’s game. After a while, sexting becomes pretty silly or even laughable. Like when he paints a sexy scenario that has so many spelling and grammatical errors or when his junk looks weird. How are you supposed to take the joker seriously after that? It’s just not happening!
Giulia Simolo is a writer from Johannesburg, South Africa with a degree in English Language and Literature. She has been working as a journalist for more than a decade, writing for sites including AskMen, Native Interiors, and Live Eco. You can find out more about her on Facebook and LinkedIn, or follow her on Twitter @GiuliaSimolo.
close-link
close-link