Are You A Good Wingwoman? 10 Ways To Help Your BFF Get Hooked Up

Having good girlfriends by your side is a necessity all the time, but especially when it comes to looking for a great guy. Whether you’re helping your girl as she gets back into the dating game after a crappy relationship or trying to score her a hot fling for the evening, here’s exactly what you need to do in order to be the best wingwoman in history:

  1. Make sure your friend actually wants to be set up. This seems obvious, but it’s worth mentioning. There’s nothing worse than a friend deciding to wingwoman you when you aren’t in the mood and you literally are just going out to have fun. Maybe she’s still not quite over the last guy or maybe she just wants to stay single for a while. Either way, it’s important to check first before you launch into your self-appointed matchmaker role.
  2. Make sure you go for guys she’d actually be into. What kind of guy is she looking for? What is her usual type? You need to get specific before you start scoping out possible matches for her, so make sure you’re both on the same wavelength so you can pick guys she’ll actually be interested in.
  3. Pre-game together before you head out The best part of a wingwoman mission is getting all dolled up. Pre-game your night out by getting ready together and making sure you both look great and feel confident in your best outfits. Some might say to make sure you don’t look as good as your friend so as not to detract from her chances of meeting someone, but that’s ridiculous advice. She’s not the jealous type and you know she has so many incredible qualities that you don’t need to worry about her failing to shine.
  4. Encourage her without being overbearing. Part of your job is giving the pep talks when needed. We all need a bit of encouragement from time to time and giving your friend that extra push she needs is what a good wingwoman does! Compliments go a long way in their time of need, so be sure to tell her all the things that you think are amazing about her. However, refrain from going overboard with this and coming off as condescending or fake. It’s a fine line, but you’ve got this!
  5. Stay Focused On Your Friend. While yes, you might also want to be looking for yourself, if you’ve already decided that this night is about your friend, keep it about her. If she’s already feeling fragile then you finding someone might not be the best idea. There are other nights that can be all about you — this is your friend’s time to shine.
  6. Take the Initiative. The hardest part of meeting someone is actually initiating conversation with them. It’s your duty as the wingwoman to take this upon yourself and make it easy for both of them to talk to each other. Don’t wait until your friend finds a guy that she’s into — go over and start a conversation yourself and make it easy for your friend to approach the both of you. Obviously you don’t want to let the conversation go too far before she makes her entrance, but building the initial bridge to conversation will go a long way.
  7. Make sure things are going well. When you first introduce them, make sure to linger for a while to check the conversation is going smoothly, especially if your friend is shy or nervous. She may need a helping hand in getting the ball rolling. Have a few conversation starters up your sleeve and try to find commonalities between the two of them.
  8. Know when to make your exit. A good wingwoman knows when she’s not wanted. If it’s a group thing, make sure to leave the two of them some time to talk. If it’s only the three of you, you never want to overstay your welcome, so as soon as the conversation is flowing, excuse yourself and make your way to the bar.
  9. Have a Back-Up Plan. Have a plan so that you can let each other know if it starts going south. Whether it’s a secret sign or a plan for you to walk past in 10 minutes, have a plan of action so you can pull your friend out quickly and save her from an awkward situation. The last thing you want is for her to get stuck with a creep you set her up with in the first place.
  10. Make it Fun. Failing everything else, make sure you’re having fun in the process. When you actively look like you’re hunting for men, you’re going to scare them off, so make your main aim to have a fun night. You can easily keep your eyes peeled while having a crazy time on the dance floor! Also, fun people attract other fun people, so it’s a win all around.
Michelle Elman is a body confidence activist, certified life coach, creator of Scarred not Scared, and founder of Mindset for Life. She’s written for publications including Cosmopolitan, Huffington Post, and Grazia and appeared on ITV’s “This Morning,” Sky News, Loose Women, and more. She’s also the author of the book “How To Say No.” You can follow Michelle on Instagram at @michelleelman, on Twitter @michelleelman, or on her website, MichelleElman.com.
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