We know that fairy tales aren’t real — in fact, they’re ridiculous interpretations of real life. We’re still obsessed with them. Whoever decided that women should be brought up believing this crap should be smacked, because it’s so far from the truth and makes us want something that we’ll never have. Here’s why dating sucks when you’re still obsessed with fairy tales:
- Chivalry is dead. Sure, some guys still open doors and others always offer to pay, but in general, chivalry is a dead art form. Men definitely aren’t knights in shining armor these days, that’s for sure.
- Happily ever after is a lie. Cinderella and Prince Charming may have grown old together, but anyone that’s ever seen a British Monarch movie knows it usually ends with someone getting their head chopped off instead of living happily ever after.
- You’re not a princess. That alone almost kills the fairy tale vibe altogether. You can pretend you’re a princess all you want, but that’ll probably just make you look like a nutcase and make dating suck more than it already does.
- Your expectations are ridiculous. Admit it — your expectations are way too high and almost no one meets your standards. Thanks a lot, Disney.
- You want the foot pop. Because that’s how it happens in fairy tales! When you meet The One and you kiss, your foot just magically pops. Only… it actually doesn’t.
- Men just aren’t that romantic. Some guys are probably the ‘rose petals on the bed’ type, but the percentage of the male population that is likely to be romantic like that is very, very small. Sigh.
- Love at first sight is not a real thing. But you want it to be! You want a guy to take one look at you and just know you’re the one for him — not just the one to get naked with him.
- Tinder has ruined dating. When sex is basically on demand like Friends reruns, why on earth would guys go through the effort of being romantic? Stop swiping and bring back the effort.
- I buy cheesy pickup lines hook, line, and sinker. Cheesy, horrible pickup lines are a fairy tale-obsessed woman’s dream! I know these lines are meant to get men laid, but I still giggle like a teenager and blush when any guy tries to use them.
- You’re incredibly jealous. Because you want a freakin’ fairy tale, you get insanely jealous of couples who appear to have that kind of love. It’s not an attractive trait, and it makes dating even harder.
