When you meet a new person, it can be nerve-wracking to figure out what kind of relationship they’re looking for. Being able to tell if they’re interested in something real or just keeping things casual can save you from stress and heartache. Paying attention to certain dating behaviors can help you find out whether he’s thinking long-term or fling.
- He “doesn’t believe in labels.” This is one of the most ridiculous things that guys say to avoid actually admitting that would rather not have a real relationship with you. If he doesn’t want to call you his girlfriend, it’s because he likes the status quo and is just not that into you. He really doesn’t want things to progress much further.
- He’s only interested in lazy dates. There’s nothing wrong with Netflix and chill every now and then, but it becomes a problem when that’s all he wants to do. Someone who wants something serious with you will take you out on meaningful dates so you can bond. If most of the dates you’re going on involve hanging out at each other’s apartments and require little to no planning, that should tell you something.
- He avoids talking about the future. The reason he shuts down any conversation that revolves around the future is that he doesn’t see you in it. He’ll probably talk about the two of you without using “we” or “us” because you’re still two separate people in his mind.
- He doesn’t introduce you to friends or family. A guy who never wants you to meet his family or close friends is a guy who thinks the relationship is not serious enough for that, especially if you’ve been going out for a while. This is a very important step in any real relationship. If he’s not keen on meeting your family or introducing you to the people that matter to him, he doesn’t care that much about what you have.
- He doesn’t like making plans far in advance. I’m not talking about huge plans like buying a house or having kids or moving in together. It can be as simple as inviting you to a concert or event happening months from that moment or even talking about traveling together sometime in the future and working towards it. Not doing that shows he doesn’t think you’ll be together that far in the future.
- He shies away from emotional connections. A person who wants a future with you would be interested in forging more than just a physical connection. He’ll open up about his life, worries, beliefs, little secrets, goals, and let himself be vulnerable around you.
- He’s not curious about you. When you really like someone, you want to know as much as you can about them, and even more so if you see a potential future with them with it. Someone who’s not curious to find out what makes you tick and your passions and interests probably doesn’t think it’s worth it. Not wanting to know you on a deeper personal level is good proof that he’s in it for a short time only.
- He’s rarely ever available when you need him. Don’t take it personally if the person you’re dating doesn’t care enough to be there when it matters. Whether it’s ignoring your calls, texts, or making excuses, understand it’s not your fault. Keep it moving. If he can’t meet your needs, then you don’t need him.
- He never makes an effort to make you feel special. A guy that really likes you and wants a long-term relationship will put in the work to make you feel special and loved. If he’s not making an effort, that could mean he doesn’t expect you to be around for very long. You either need to ask him to step up or keep looking for a relationship with someone who will give you the affection you deserve.
- He doesn’t text or call you often. Seriously, if the dude isn’t making an effort to call or text to catch up and see how you’re doing, he doesn’t want to know because he’s interested in keeping it casual. I am notoriously bad at texting and I hate calls but I still make an effort for people I care about.
- He tells you he’s not looking for something serious. This is the most obvious behavior of all, but it’s also the one that people tend to disregard a lot. If someone tells you they didn’t want anything serious, believe them. Listen to what he is saying. Whatever his reasons are, I promise you it is not important and is probably just an excuse. Don’t go holding on to expectations that will likely end in tears.
