Are You In An Equal Relationship Or Are You Just Being Taken Advantage Of?

Two people putting in equal amounts of time, love and effort — that’s what a healthy relationship should be, not one jerk with manipulative tendencies and one amazingly patient and understanding woman. In fact, that’s a recipe for a controlling relationship — here’s how to tell if you’re in one:

1. He Always Gets His Way. And honestly, it might be because you put up with anything he does. You don’t want to lose him, so you pretend you’re not bothered by his actions. When he lies to you, you brush it off. When he hangs out with his ex-girlfriend, you convince yourself that exes really can stay friends — LIES! He does what he wants regardless of how you feel about it because he knows he can.
2. You Don’t Speak Your Mind. If he does something that upsets you, you let it go. You never tell him when you’re pissed off or unhappy. You’re too afraid that he might break up with you if you show the tiniest amount of frustration towards the relationship. So instead, you bury your feelings until they pretty much disappear altogether.
3. He Never Apologizes For Anything. You two never really argue, but that’s because you apologize before an argument even breaks out. Even when you’re not the one at fault, you apologize. A part of you does it because you don’t want to see him upset, but another part (the bigger part) does it because you know that if you don’t apologize, he won’t apologize, and the relationship will come to a halt — you don’t want that.
4. You Cater To Him. You do everything for your guy (besides wash his clothes — his mom handles that), but he does nothing for you. Nothing! He’s never surprised you with flowers or called you beautiful when you least expected it. The relationship feels one-sided because it IS one-sided. You give and he takes — it’s as simple as that.
5. You’re Afraid He Might Break Up With You. He’s almost broken up with you before, hasn’t he? Or maybe he’s made a dumb-ass comment about how many girls are after him. Whatever it is he’s said, you know there’s a chance he could dump you at any minute, which is why you’re so incredibly patient with him. He makes you feel like an option rather than his first and only choice, and that feeling is what’s really controlling you.
6. You’re Always Waiting For Him. Whether you’re just casually texting or trying to make weekend plans, you’re the one who has to initiate contact — and even then, there’s a 99 percent chance he won’t reply right away… or at all. You can tell he has all the control in the relationship when you spend more time waiting for a text back than actually texting.
7. He’s Not Very Nice To You. He doesn’t treat you like a girlfriend. To be quite honest, he doesn’t even treat you like a friend. Maybe he’s not downright rude, but he’s definitely not very nice. He never compliments you, takes you out, or makes you feel special. He doesn’t do anything a boyfriend should do for his girlfriend because he knows he doesn’t have to in order to keep you.
8. You Know You Care More. There’s no doubt in your mind that he’d be fine if this relationship ended. That’s not to say he doesn’t care about you — he does, just not as much as you care about him. But you know that already, don’t you? You’re very aware of how manipulative this relationship is, and you know you should probably walk away. You just can’t.
9. He Calls The Shots In The Bedroom. You NEVER say no, especially not in the bedroom. Whenever he’s in the mood, you are too (even if you’re really not). If he wants to try something a little bit freaky, you’re down for it. You know there are a million (okay, five tops) other girls he could be sleeping with and you don’t want that, so you put a smile on your face, moan when needed, and go along with it.
10. He Makes Sure You’re Vulnerable. He knows just what to say and do to make you feel like crap — and he says and does them regularly. In order to control you, he has to know what your weaknesses are so he can target them when needed. Think about it: there’s probably been more than one occasion where he’s made you feel insecure. He does that on purpose. It’s to keep you weak so that he can keep controlling you. Screw that — you deserve better.