9 Reasons You Fall for Players Every Time

9 Reasons You Fall for Players Every Time

You know what you’re looking for in a relationship and what BS not to put up with, but somehow, you always end up getting screwed over by the same type of loser guys every single time — so what’s the deal? Why do you keep falling for players?

  1. Your don’t recognize your own worth. Are you worthy of love? That question should be a no-brainer, but sadly you don’t believe the answer is yes. Your lack of self-confidence is directly related to the type of men you attract. Bottom line? You settle, because underneath it all you really don’t think you deserve true love.
  2. You’re desperate for love. You want love so badly that you look past all the red flags just to ensure you have someone, anyone in your life. Why are you willing to give up on finding Mr. Right just to have Mr. Right Now? You need to stop searching for just anyone and hold out for The One, because you’re just going to end up miserable otherwise.
  3. You always think you know best. Despite the fact that your friends warn you, you let yourself fall for him anyway. It’s OK that you need to make your own mistakes, but do you really need to repeat the same ones over and over again? Listen to your girls for once, because when it comes to your love life, it’s clear you don’t always know best.
  4. You like a challenge… Maybe a little too much. What’s love without the risk? Well, does happiness really sound so bad? You don’t want something easy, because in your mind if love isn’t a challenge, then what’s the point?
  5. You depend on love to make you happy. Deep down, you’re really not happy with your life, so you look for men to give you reassurance. The players are the ones who give you ridiculously dramatic and sappy compliments as soon as they meet you, while the good guys take their time. You’re looking for an instant upper, but you can’t rush real love.
  6. You’re addicted to the drama. You wouldn’t know how to date without playing games. Despite the tears and frustration, you just love the games. Sure, the heartbreak kills, but it’s a bipolar kind of love. Every devastating low is worth it, because you don’t want relationships without the feeling of the epic highs of a risky love.
  7. You never learn. You’ve fallen for a player once or twice (OK, a hell of a lot more times) before, but you just never learn from your mistakes. Once you finally pick yourself back up from the last blow to your heart then you’re ready for the next wave to hit your heart. You don’t take the time to figure out what went wrong or what signs you didn’t see (or just plain ignored). You’re playing dumb, and with an attitude like that you’ll never succeed.
  8. You only want love if there’s competition. You secretly like the guys who get lots of women, because that means other women want him, too. You like to know that he’s in hot demand, and you’re bored by those one-woman kinds of men. There’s no thrill to playing the game if you’re not fighting for it, because without competition, how do you really know you came out on top?
  9. You have no clue what you really want. You think you have a pretty good idea, but you never take the time to figure out what you really want in a man, relationship, or even your future. You’re in it for the moment with no sense of what it’s really like to have a mature, adult relationship. You deserve so much better.
Kelsey Dykstra is a freelance writer based in Huntington Beach, CA. She has a bachelor’s degree in Creative Writing from Grand Valley State University and been writing professionally since graduating in 2013. In addition to writing about love and relationships for Bolde and lifestyle topics for Love to Know, she also writes about payment security and small business solutions for PaymentCloud.

Originally from Michigan, this warm weather seeker relocated to the OC just last summer. Kelsey enjoys writing her own fictional pieces, reading a variety of young adult novels, binging on Netflix, and of course soaking up the sun.

You can find more about Kelsey on her LinkedIn profile or on Twitter @dykstrakelsey.
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