13 Bad Dating Behaviors You Grow Out Of When You Become A Strong, Badass Woman

If you’ve made some dating mistakes in the past, don’t worry—the older you get, the more self-assured you’ll become so you can kiss those dating dramas goodbye once and for all. Thank goodness. Just make sure you don’t do them again, like these 13 dating behaviors.

  1. Double-texting. Come on, you know he received the message. You can see two blue ticks next to it, so he’s even read it. So why the hell would you have to send him another text? Just don’t.
  2. Being a dating chameleon. You know that he’s an adrenaline junkie, so you play up that side of your personality before a date to impress him and make him see you have so much in common. Ugh. The best way to play a first date is to be yourself. That way, when he likes you, you know it’s legit.
  3. Trying to fix him. All those times you wasted time and energy trying to fix a toxic guy who promised to change for you but then never did? Yeah, good riddance to that crap. You know that no one can change anyone else, except themselves. Don’t go for the DIY boyfriend – go for one who’s already complete. It’s much less stressful and much more fun.
  4. Being impressed by things that aren’t impressive. He was so hot, he was tough and manly, he fought another guy at the bar because that guy was hitting on you. All these things that made you swoon are so last decade. Truth is, they don’t make him good boyfriend material.
  5. Waiting for him to show you your worth. It’s flattering when a guy you like makes you feel like a million bucks by telling you how amazing you are. But you don’t have to wait around for a guy to boost your self-confidence like that. You fill your own cup, thank you very much.
  6. Feeling self-conscious about your body during sex. You hate your thighs, you hate how your butt dimples from this angle, you hope your BF’s not going to think you’re so ugly—enough! When you accept yourself for who you are and what you look like, you stop letting “flaws” bring you down or suck your sexual pleasure. You know you deserve to feel amazing in the sack, so you concentrate on that. Nice.
  7. Spilling about your love life to your friends. Yeah, it looked fun on SATC, but honestly, confiding in your friends about every movement in your dating life is weird. Besides, you don’t want to depend on their dating advice because you’re the one who has to live with it, so it’s better to figure things out for yourself.
  8. Thinking clinginess will lead to commitment. Don’t fall into the trap of thinking that being super available for the guy and attentive to him will make him fall for you. You know that the opposite is often true, so really, you don’t have to try so hard to be what he wants. You deserve love based on who you are, not what you do.
  9. Thinking flirting means he wants to date you. Um, it doesn’t. A guy can heavily flirt with you, and all it means is that you had a flirting session. Same goes for a guy who tells you he likes you or how he wants you to meet his friends. If he’s not showing you real actions that lead to dating, then he’s not dating you. Period.
  10. Benching a date. Having a date in reserve so that you don’t have to go to a function alone might seem practical, but who cares if you fly solo? Seriously, it’s just not worth settling for a date that you don’t even like so that you can have someone by your side. He’s just cramping your style!
  11. Texting him to check that he got the right number. You meet a hot guy who asks for your number, so you give it to him and he inputs it on his phone. Then, you ask him to read it back to you or you say, “Let me text you to be sure you got the right number.” WTF? He got the right number, and if he didn’t, then he never intended to call you. Don’t come off as desperate.
  12. Smiling when you don’t want to. You don’t want to be seen as angry/upset/aloof so you slap a smile on your face. WTF for? If you don’t feel like smiling and looking cheerful AF, then why pretend to be? Is it just to make men think you’re warm and friendly, and avoid the “unapproachable” label? Screw that.
  13. Fighting off compliments. A guy tells you that your hair looks stunning or you’re so pretty, and instead of just accepting the compliment, you tell him that you actually hate your looks or your hair’s such a mess today. WTF? Why do that? For attention? For more compliments? Ugh, it’s just not worth coming off as insecure or a damsel who needs to be rescued by compliments. A woman with strong self-esteem knows her worth and even if she doesn’t think her hair looks fab, she’ll take the compliment like a badass woman by saying “thank you.”
Giulia Simolo is a writer from Johannesburg, South Africa with a degree in English Language and Literature. She has been working as a journalist for more than a decade, writing for sites including AskMen, Native Interiors, and Live Eco. You can find out more about her on Facebook and LinkedIn, or follow her on Twitter @GiuliaSimolo.
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