12 Things NOT To Do After A Bad First Date

First dates come in three versions—the good, the bad and the ugly. The world is full of advice and etiquette to ensure a good first date, but sadly, good ones aren’t the norm. So what’s the protocol after a bad one? Well, whatever you do, make sure you DON’T do these things:

  1. Disregard a second date Sometimes an amazing relationship can start with a really terrible first date. Things don’t always go as planned and sometimes our first impression isn’t our best. So if the date was bad but the guy was sweet, give him a second chance.
  2. Stop believing you deserve love You can’t let whether or not a date goes well dictate your self-confidence. If you really want to find love, you’re going to need to grow some thicker skin. Just because you haven’t found love yet, doesn’t mean you don’t deserve it. You’re worthy of real love and believing that you’re going to find just that is half the battle.
  3. Immediately sign up for online dating Signing up for a paid subscription to an online dating service shouldn’t be a decision you make on a whim. That’s just throwing money down the drain. One bad date or even a series of them doesn’t mean that you need a mathematical algorithm to find your perfect mate or that cyber dating is better than face to face. Instead, sleep on it. If, a month down the line, you still feel like online dating is what’s right for you, then take the plunge. Until then, don’t let one bad night dictate the entire future of your love life.
  4. Block his number You never know what this guy was going through at the time. If he was a jerk beyond belief, sure, feel free to bitch him out, but if it was simply a bad date, give the guy the benefit of the doubt. Maybe he owes you an apology, but if you block his number, you’re just making it harder for him to give that apology. Unless he seriously wronged you, leave some form of communication open for the chance that he really is a nice guy.
  5. Lead him on You never know how the date looked to the other person. He might have butterflies while you just weren’t feeling it. While some guys deserve a second chance, if you’re not interested in a second date, tell him. Leading him on is doing a disservice to both of you. If you’re just not that into him, don’t waste his time.
  6. Share it on social media Don’t be petty. You never know who knows whom, and the things you say might just get back to this guy. You can tell your best friend about his bad behavior, but your 500+ online acquaintances don’t need to know about how he spent half the evening glued to his phone.
  7. Blame yourself Just because you had a bad date doesn’t mean you’re a bad date. Sometimes people just don’t click. If you could connect with anyone, relationships wouldn’t be so special. It’s not your fault, so stop looking for fault in yourself because there’s nothing wrong with you.
  8. Blame the whole male population If one guy is a jerk, that doesn’t mean all men are horrible. Your date wasn’t a reflection of the entire male population, just like one rude girl doesn’t speak for the female population. This guy may have wasted his one chance with you, but give dating a second chance with a different guy.
  9. Hit up your ex Bad dates can make you nostalgic for the good old days, but that doesn’t mean your loser ex-boyfriend deserves another shot. Just like you’re remembering the bad moments of the date, remember the bad moments of that relationship and don’t go crawling back. There’s no need to settle for just good enough, so delete his number and hold out for true love.
  10. Wallow in self-pity Save the wallowing for the serious breakups because everyone has a bad date every once in a while. One crappy date doesn’t mean you’re forever alone and destined to be a tragic cat lady. If it weren’t for the bad dates, you wouldn’t be able to appreciate the good. Stop feeling sorry for yourself and suck it the hell up.
  11. Lower your standards One bad date doesn’t mean you’re setting the bar too high. You deserve love. You deserve a life-changing, butterfly-inducing first date. When it comes to love, it’s okay to be picky. Keep your standards high and enjoy the single life until you find the love you deserve.
  12. Give up Bad dates are a part of life. You can’t just give up on love every time a relationship doesn’t work out. Stuff happens and you just have to keep on trying. When you finally find “The One,” the bad dates (and their epic stories) will all be worth it. Just remember, you’ve got to date a lot of wrong guys to find the right one.
Kelsey Dykstra is a freelance writer based in Huntington Beach, CA. She has a bachelor’s degree in Creative Writing from Grand Valley State University and been writing professionally since graduating in 2013. In addition to writing about love and relationships for Bolde and lifestyle topics for Love to Know, she also writes about payment security and small business solutions for PaymentCloud.

Originally from Michigan, this warm weather seeker relocated to the OC just last summer. Kelsey enjoys writing her own fictional pieces, reading a variety of young adult novels, binging on Netflix, and of course soaking up the sun.

You can find more about Kelsey on her LinkedIn profile or on Twitter @dykstrakelsey.
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