When you first start dating someone, of course you’re excited to learn everything about them, and that means you’ll need to ask questions. Some are necessary, others border on annoying, and a few should be avoided at all costs if you want your relationship to last. After all, you don’t want your boyfriend to feel like he’s being interrogated. While communication is key, if this information doesn’t come out organically, you probably don’t need to know right now.
- How much money he makes Until you’re discussing marriage, this just really isn’t any of your business and it’s tacky, to boot. You might not be a gold digger, but you’ll certainly look like one if you’re asking about his income.
- If you look fat It just makes you look insecure, and that’s not hot. Besides, you know whether or not you look fat. You don’t need someone else to tell you what one quick look in the mirror can you tell you much more clearly.
- How many people he’s slept with We all have a past. As long as he’s clean, it really shouldn’t be any of your concern how many girls came before you. You weren’t his first, but hopefully (if you can keep your mouth shut), you’ll be his last. Besides, do you really want to start that conversation? You aren’t exactly known for your chastity.
- What you’ll name your kids Unless you’ve already talked about starting a family together one day, this is one of the most presumptuous questions you can ask your guy. If you haven’t already talked about having a family together, this will probably freak him out (and rightfully so).
- When he’s going to buy you a ring It’s fine to want to know where your relationship is going, but this is the wrong way to start that conversation. Ask where he sees you as a couple in the next year, etc. Asking about a ring makes it sound like you care more about the jewelry than the relationship.
- If he’s circumcised If you can’t tell, then he probably got a botch job, and if that’s the case, he probably doesn’t really want to talk about it. And if you’ve never actually slept together yet, this is seriously none of your business.
- If you’re the best he’s ever had He’s never going to say no, and if he, does he’s a loser. If he says yes, you’ll wonder if he’s just placating you, so don’t waste your breath and make things awkward for nothing. Obviously, the things you do together in the bedroom are pretty great or he wouldn’t be keen on doing it so often.
- If he’s still in love with his ex If you have to ask, you probably already know the answer and you two shouldn’t be together in the first place. You shouldn’t be dating someone whose ex is still a big part of the picture (or in the picture at all, really, unless they have kids or a dog together).
- If he’s been going to the gym It should be obvious, whether he’s working out or not. If he has been, it’s better to pose your compliment as a fact than a question, i.e. “I can tell you’ve been going to the gym, you look great!” If he hasn’t, don’t rub it in — you’re just being judgy AF.
- What he really thinks of your mom You know that only you and your siblings are allowed to talk smack on your mom and get away with it. If anyone else says anything less than amazing about the #1 woman in your life, you’ll destroy them. If you expect the truth and don’t want to ruin your relationship, don’t ask. She didn’t give birth to him, so he’s not obligated to love her, just like you don’t have to be his mom’s number one fan.
- Questions about his Instagram account Who was that girl who commented on his photo, and why does he still have pics of his ex-girlfriend from college? It doesn’t matter. You’re not the social media police, and if you’re doing that much of a deep dive into his accounts, you’re going too far.
- Which of your friends he would sleep with This is a loaded question if there ever was one. If he says he would never be interested in any of them, he’s probably lying, and if he starts name-dropping, you’ll second guess him every time they’re in the same room together. This is an easy way to ruin your friendships and your relationship at the same time. There is no good answer, so just don’t ask the question.
