Sometimes you want a boyfriend by your side, sometimes you want to be left alone to chug an entire bottle of wine. There are plenty of instances where even the most supportive boyfriends aren’t going to help the situation at all, unless he’s making you a cocktail. From rough OBGYN appointments to epic cheat meals, here are 10 times when you need a drink more than you need a boyfriend:
- When it’s the series finale. Not only have you bonded with the characters in your favorite show over years of being a loyal fan, but watching it has become one of your favorite weekly rituals. You know the tear-jerking ending is going to be a little intense for you, and you have the wine queued up in preparation. A boyfriend’s not going to be able to comfort you because, let’s face it — he has no clue why this is important to you.
- When your plane’s delayed…again. Hello, airport bar! Having a boyfriend around is essentially useless since your conversation now consists only of excessive heavy sighs and the occasional reminder to watch the bags when you use the restroom.
- When it’s your annual checkup. You don’t want anything coming near your vagina after your annual pap smear. Any attempts to comfort you when you’re experiencing some post-appointment cramps are just annoying because he’ll never understand the regularly pains and annoyances of being a woman. Why turn to someone who could never relate when you can grab a vodka soda and tackle the rest of your day like a warrior?
- When your friend’s going through a bad breakup. You don’t want a boyfriend around either reminding her of how crappy men can be, accidentally making her regret her break up decision, or just generally doing a crummy job of helping get her back on her feet. What she needs is cocktails, and lots of them. Take her out for a girl’s night, no boyfriends allowed.
- When you’ve had wayyy too much coffee. You’re so amped up that if someone touches you, you might accidentally drop kick them out of pure caffeine overdose rage. You’re super edgy, a little shaky, and definitely contemplating your all coffee, no sleep lifestyle. Someone telling you to relax will probably result in you losing your mind on them, but a drink might bring you down enough to stop being a hyped up psycho.
- When you’re really just trying to watch Netflix. You’re trying to chill, not bone. Your rose has never tried to cut your Netflix binge short in an attempt to get it on. If anything, it encourages you to watch one more episode, pour another glass, and then watch one more.
- When it’s cheat meal time. If you’ve been on a strict diet plan, you don’t want anything to come between you and your treats on cheat day. You can have a boyfriend any day of the week, but cheat day is all about pizza, doughnuts, and whiskey. There’s a lot of sugar in alcohol, so you gotta get it in now.
- When it’s the office holiday party. Having a date sounds good in theory, but is horrible in practice. They stand around awkwardly and you spend the entire night introducing him to people and reminding him who he already hates based on work stories you’ve told him in the past. Ditch the date, grab a bottle of the good stuff and get drunk enough to get through the party without dying of boredom.
- When you’re trying to multitask. Multitasking can be stressful, as you’re essentially working at a hyper manic pace to get everything done. You don’t need a guy “helping” when you can get stuff done faster than it takes to explain to him what to do, but you could probably use a beer to help motivate you to keep it up without breaking down under the pressure of life.
- When you just need a good cry. Sometimes, you just need a good cry without anyone trying to tell you that everything is going to be fine. Nothing is guaranteed to turn out fine, and the best plan of action can be to take a time out, feel sad, and then make a plan of how to deal. It’s Ok to have a drink, have a cry, and get back on your feet instead of allowing your boyfriend to try to fix everything for you. Of course, he doesn’t want to see you sad or hurting, but sometimes it’s just a necessary step he can’t skip over for you.
