10 Signs You’ve Been Single So Long, You’ve Forgotten How To Be In A Relationship

Being single is great… until you meet someone that you actually like and start dating him. Sure, you’re jumping for joy that you can finally say goodbye to bad dates and uncertainty, but you realize pretty quickly that you’ve forgotten how to be in a relationship.Here are 10 signs that you need a refresher course on how to be a girlfriend:Here are 10 signs that you need a refresher course on how to be a girlfriend:

  1. You think in terms of me, not we. You’ve been on your own for so long, you’re used to making decisions for yourself and yourself alone. When you finally date someone, you find it pretty much impossible to remember that he’s a part of your life now — and that means involving him in the choices that you make, whether they’re big or small.
  2. You’re super attached to your routine. There’s nothing wrong with having a routine. It’s awesome that you have your job, friends, hobbies, and interests locked down. The problem? When you start dating someone new and can’t switch up your schedule even one bit. You can’t help it. You’re used to doing the same things day in, day out, with nothing and no one interrupting.
  3. You can’t go with the flow. Relationships need to grow and change, and of course that means having serious talks with your boyfriend about where things are going. But at a certain point, you have to realize that being a part of a couple means going with the flow. You have to let things happen naturally or you’re going to risk turning him off. Since you’ve been organizing and planning every inch of your single life for a long time now, that’s super tricky for you.
  4. You forget that you have a plus-one. If you still go to parties and events alone even when you have a boyfriend, that’s a huge sign that you’ve totally got relationship amnesia. You may be used to being solo, but it’s time to get used to being the girlfriend that you are. It’s okay to bring your BF with you to your best friend’s birthday or your coworker’s promotion celebration.
  5. You hate feeling unsettled. The good thing about being single AF is that you’re totally and completely in control. You know what you’re doing and where you’re going, and when you’re not happy, you can make changes ASAP. When you’re in a relationship, there’s a certain amount of letting go and believing that things are going to work out. If you’re too controlling, you can probably guess how that’s going to work out. It just takes you a while to get over feeling like your life isn’t curated and controlled anymore.
  6. You constantly wait for the other shoe to drop. It’s not normal to expect your boyfriend to dump you when you have a small argument, and it’s definitely not normal to always wait for something to go wrong. When you’ve forgotten how to be with someone, this always happens. You can’t shake the feeling that you’re about to be heartbroken once again, even if your new guy is awesome and there’s no reason to feel that way.
  7. You get clingy despite your best efforts. You tell yourself to stay calm, cool, and collected and not be a cling-wrap girlfriend. But somehow, this always backfires and you find yourself double-texting, wondering why he hasn’t responded yet, and freaking out to your BFFs. You finally have someone in your life and you can’t help but want to be in touch with him 24/7.
  8. You go through periods of ignoring him. Then there are the times when you refuse to leave your single girl life behind and you spend a few nights binge-watching Netflix to your heart’s content. You ignore your boyfriend’s texts and basically become a total hypocrite. He’s confused, and you don’t blame him because hey, you’re even starting to confuse yourself.
  9. You feel awkward all the time. There are relationship girls who always know exactly what to say and what to do… and then there’s you. You’re so used to being without a boyfriend, you’re super awkward when you finally get one. You always feel like you’re turning him off or being ridiculous even when absolutely nothing is wrong.
  10. You still feel single. When you’ve truly forgotten how amazing it is to be in a relationship, you still feel like you’re rocking your solo status even when you’re not. You’ve worn this as a badge of honor for so long that it’s really hard to give it up — even harder than you might have thought. You know that eventually, you’re going to get over yourself and start being a normal girlfriend. But for now, you’re kind of all over the place, and that’s just the way that it goes.
Aya Tsintziras is a freelance lifestyle writer and editor from Toronto, Canada. In addition to writing about dating and relationships for Bolde, she also writes about movies, TV, and video games for ScreenRant and GameRant. She has a Political Science degree from the University of Toronto and a Masters of Journalism from Ryerson University. You can find her on Twitter @ayatsintziras and on Instagram @aya.tsintziras.
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