Relationships, by definition, include two or more people. That means there always has to be a level of give and take on everyone’s part, because it’s impossible to always get your way when someone else is concerned. Being able to compromise is an essential part of a healthy relationship, but a lot of the time, you don’t realize you’re the one that’s been doing all the compromising. While that kind situation may work for a little while, you deserve to get just as much out of a relationship as you put in.
- You always initiate contact. Every conversation you have happens because you texted or called them. You actually wonder sometimes if you’d ever hear from them at all if you weren’t the one making all the effort.
- You’re always the one making plans. They never seem interested in planning anything with you. Unless you do all the work that is. They’ll show up, but they’ll never take the initiative to ask you to hang out.
- You ask them how things are going, but they never ask you. You remember they had a big presentation at work last week, and you’ll ask them how it went. But expecting them to remember even the most important things going on in your life is just setting yourself up for disappointment.
- They take you for granted. For some reason they seem to think you’ll always be around, no matter how badly they treat you. They don’t bother making much of an effort to maintain your relationship because they know you’ll pick up their slack.
- They only contact you when they want something. If they do send you a spontaneous text, it’s always because they need a ride to the airport, or they need to borrow your DSLR for a work thing. They never call just to catch up.
- You feel taken advantage of. They don’t care if the favors they ask are inconveniencing you. They just expect you to be available to cater to their every whim because you always have been in the past.
- You’d do anything for them, but they wouldn’t do the same for you. You’re completely devoted to the people you care about, and loyal almost to a fault. The problem is you expect the same in return, and you rarely get it.
- You don’t feel safe in your relationships. When you open up and share your vulnerable side with people it’s because you want to feel closer to them, but if they don’t give you the support you need, you’ll end up feeling like they’re leaving you hanging.
- You’re always apologizing. While you’re willing to admit when you’re wrong and work on things, they’d rather let you shoulder all the blame than admit their own responsibility. They seem to think they’re perfect, and you’re the one that keeps screwing things up.
- They keep you on the periphery of their life. You make an effort to include them in your life, but they routinely do things without talking to you about it first. They clearly don’t consider your opinion important, but you continue to give them more attention than they deserve.
