10 Rules Of Women Who Put Themselves First

There’s merit in generosity and selflessness for sure, but there’s a fine line between being minorly inconvenienced to make other people happy and putting everyone else’s desires and needs ahead of your own. It’s important not to sacrifice your own happiness and well-being in trying to preserve others’. If you often end up putting yourself last, it doesn’t have to be that way. Follow the rules of women who know better:

  1. They figure out what they want in life. Rather than letting the world dictate what makes them happy, they decide what dreams to chase. It’s not about meeting other people’s expectations — it’s about determining your own and going for them no matter what.
  2. They don’t try to please everyone around them. People-pleasers are rarely happy. Women who put their own needs first tend to be much more satisfied with their lives. Letting the needs of other dictate your life is a surefire way to make yourself miserable. Instead, these women are focussed on meeting their needs, not everyone else’s. They’re not selfish, but they do know that they’re not responsible for everyone else’s happiness.
  3. They look after their body and mind. They know that while they have amazing friends and family and maybe even a partner, in the end, there’s no guarantee that anyone is going to look out for them — that’s why they have to make sure they’re doing it themselves.This can be as basic as making sure that they eat well and get the exercise they need. Waiting for some hero to come fix you is so not the way forward. Smart ladies go ahead and fix themselves.
  4. They ignore negative voices. If there’s one thing that people envy more than anything else, it’s happiness. The emotion seems so fleeting and elusive that most can’t stand it when they see someone holding onto it, so they harness the only power they have left — they try to bring you down with negativity. Women who put themselves first don’t let this type of negativity affect them; they’re pros at blocking it out and staying the course.
  5. They don’t waste time worrying what others think. Women who put themselves first never waste their precious time considering what other people think. They know that they’re the only ones who know their own lives and the only ones living them, so what anyone else thinks or feels about their decisions really doesn’t mean anything in the end. All that matters is what THEY think — anything else is just noise.
  6. They understand that selfishness isn’t always bad. Selfishness is often seen as a negative thing; we tell kids to ‘play fair’ and not be selfish from the very second they understand language. We chastize people for looking out for number one all the time. Still, there’s a healthy type of selfishness that we should all be applying to our lives. When women actively choose to put themselves first, that’s an example of positive selfishness. They don’t walk around screwing people over for fun, but they put their needs at the forefront of everything they do because they know that if they’re not fulfilled, they can’t possibly help anyone else.
  7. They never give men the power to determine their self-worth. While there’s nothing wrong with searching for your soulmate, using them to boost your own self-esteem is detrimental to you as a person. When a woman is in control of her own destiny, she doesn’t need the valuation of men to have self-worth; she just has it.
  8. They avoid childish men who knock them down. There are some guys (and gals) out there who need to knock others down to their level so that they can feel comfortable in their own skin. Intelligent women have absolutely zero time for these insecure fools. The world is full of people who use negativity as a way to feel superior. Well, screw them.
  9. They know when to cut people loose. When a woman is confident and puts herself first, she steers well clear of toxic people. Toxicity spreads like a virus through your life. When you have a person in your life who makes you feel less than you are — a friend, a partner, even a family member — they have to go. Having the foresight to see that saves these women a whole load of hassle and heartache.
  10. They show people how they expect to be treated. Women who have high standards in every area of their lives rarely get treated like trash. Since they see themselves as a worthwhile and deserving of the best, the world reacts and does the same. Choosing to be clear about how you should be treated is the only way forward. You don’t just get given respect; you have to earn it and demand it.
Charlotte is a freelance writer who's addicted to binge-watching TV, drinking far too much coffee, and writing articles.
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