Assertive people often get a bad rep because people can find their forward personalities grating. Hot take, but I think being assertive is a good thing! What could be better than saying exactly what you mean in a world where people love to beat around the bush? This post celebrates the best traits an assertive person should be proud to have.
1. They’re more likely to get what you want.
Probably the best thing about having an assertive personality type is that you aren’t afraid to ask for what you want. When you put yourself out there and share your feelings, more opportunities will come your way. You’re the physical embodiment of “you miss 100% of the shots you don’t take,” and because of your take-charge attitude, you’re making baskets.
2. They don’t sugarcoat things.
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It’s no use playing softball with an assertive person; they will tell you like it is. Assertive people are masters at speaking their minds and doing so directly and tactfully. Just because they don’t give you the softer version doesn’t mean they’re rude. They just call it how they see it and enjoy it when those around them benefit from the real story.
3. There’s no mistaking what they actually meant.
Words like “maybe” and “sorta” don’t exist in an assertive person’s vocabulary. They’ll tell you without hesitation and ensure you understand because they don’t have time for wishy-washy communication. These go-getters have plenty of things on their to-do lists, and they won’t be slowed down by having to reclarify their intent instead of making moves.
4. They know they can make a difference.
If you live boldly and unapologetically, you’ve probably realized that you can get a lot done that way. Assertive people know they have the power to change the world and have the courage and strength of conviction to make it happen. They make great leaders, and they’re the type of people you always want in your corner when you need to get things done.
5. They are not afraid to take the lead.
Assertiveness and power go hand in hand. Leaders not only have to be able to make hard decisions, but they also have to be comfortable communicating them to those around them. Assertive people crush things like presentations and press conferences because of their confidence and willingness to open up meaningfully.
6. They set their boundaries and have no trouble enforcing them.
If you hurt someone who is assertive’s feelings or ignore a boundary they’ve set for themselves, get ready to hear about it. These people take great pride in setting the pace for their own lives, and when people try to get in their way or hinder their sense of expression, they see it as disrespect and will not tolerate it. They might not rip you to shreds in a brutal way, but they will spell out exactly why what you did wasn’t okay.
7. They’re good at self-examination.
You can’t have the conviction that a self-assured person has without doing some serious work on the ground floor to create your identity and perspective. Though they often favor an outward presentation of self, this doesn’t mean they don’t spend plenty of time combing through various ideas to see which ones resonate the most with them. If you are going to stand by an unpopular opinion, like pineapple on pizza, you probably have to try a lot of pizzas to come armed with good reasons why.
8. They’re honest.
Some might say assertive people don’t have a filter, but it’s more like they’re not ashamed of sharing their thoughts and feelings. These people have a strong sense of self and high confidence, cultivated from deep self-acceptance and respect for autonomy. This translates to a person who won’t shy away from telling the truth when it counts and admits to being wrong when they need to.
9. They’re confident in who they are.
Self-assurance is one of the best traits assertive people have. These fearless individuals are not afraid to speak up and to let their freak flag fly. They’re so comfortable speaking up that they will even do it for their more soft-spoken friends. Their confidence allows them to bridge gaps and bring the best of themselves and others to the forefront.
10. They have unmatched tact.
A lifetime of opening up and speaking your mind will train you to navigate social situations in unexpected ways. When you come into social situations with guns blazing, you’re occasionally met with backlash and reminded that you must mind your manners. This is why assertive people have found ways to make their uncompromising desire to speak their truth a little more palatable through tactful, clear, and respectful speech. They understand that speaking up is no good if no one is willing to listen.
11. They won’t allow disrespect.
If an assertive person has spent their life honing their social skills into a sword they can wield in any situation, you better believe they’re not afraid to cut down anyone who crosses them. This isn’t due to rudeness or callousness but because they understand the delicate give and take of social interactions. They know that to be respected, you must also give respect, and people who violate that social contract might find themselves on the receiving end of a stern talking-to.
12. They see the value in other perspectives.
You might believe that assertive people just talk to hear their voice or are too stubborn to understand others’ points of view, but that couldn’t be further from the truth. Assertive people often find themselves leading the one-on-one, but that doesn’t mean they are terrible conversation partners. Assertive people need other people’s perspectives to help refine their own, which is their ultimate goal. They carefully consider other people’s attitudes and temper their understanding by comparing ideas.
13. They’re surprisingly good at compromise.
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We’ve learned that assertive people value self-expression and value what they and others have to say. This lends assertive individuals the ability to master compromise. Their assuredness in their opinion and desire to refine their perspective through hearing others’ thoughts means they are not inflexible. They don’t believe their ideas are the best; instead, they just want to be heard. As long as these people are given a fair shot, they will be content just to be part of the perfect solution.
14. They’re not afraid to break the mold.
If everyone else is obsessed with one thing, you will likely find an assertive person on the other side confidently disagreeing. Assertive people are not afraid to stray from the pack, and with excellent self-analysis skills, they will probably find and favor things that resonate with them over what is popular. Not that those two never overlap, but more succinctly, an assertive person will not settle for something that doesn’t appeal to them just to blend in.
15. They’re genuine and it’s infectious.
Assuredness is an external reflection of an evident appreciation for yourself, and it’s wholesome and aspirational. Self-assured people never need to shy away from their feelings or thoughts, and this genuine expression of self can remind us all that we should strive to be more faithful to ourselves and each other.
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